My Worst Stuttering Nightmare -A Personal Story

My Worst Nightmare Wasn’t a Test

It Was Ordering at the Deli.

by Lori Melnitsky

For more information about stuttering and to hear real case studies, check out my podcast Stuttering Demystified and Beyond.

Most kids worry about quizzes, homework, or getting called on in class.

My worst nightmare?

Ordering for everyone at the local deli.

It sounds small. Ordinary. Harmless.

But for a child who stuttered, it felt enormous.

My dad and uncle owned a pharmacy in our town. Around lunchtime, they would ask me to walk next door and place the lunch order for the whole staff. On the surface, it was a simple task. A few sandwiches. A polite hello. A quick exchange.

Inside my head, it was chaos.

I knew exactly what I wanted to say.I rehearsed the sentence over and over.“Hi, I’d like two turkey on rye, one tuna, one egg salad…”

I practiced silently while walking. I whispered it under my breath. I tried to predict which words might “get stuck.” I’d change the order. Swap out words. Shorten sentences.

What if I couldn’t get the first word out?What if I blocked?What if people behind me stared?What if the man behind the counter rushed me?

The fear wasn’t just about stuttering.

It was about being seen.

I didn’t want to be the girl who “couldn’t talk.” I didn’t want to be different. I didn’t want to feel everyone waiting while my mouth struggled to cooperate with my mind.

Sometimes I made it through.Sometimes I didn’t.

And on the days it didn’t go well, I walked back to the pharmacy feeling small.

That moment stayed with me.

Not because it was dramatic.Not because anyone was cruel.But because it taught me something powerful:

For a child who stutters, the hardest moments are often the ones adults barely notice.

It’s not just speaking in front of the class.It’s ordering food.Raising a hand.Introducing yourself.Answering the phone.

These moments can quietly shape how a child sees their voice.

Over time, many children who stutter learn to:

• Avoid speaking when they can

• Change what they want to say

• Let others talk for them

• Believe their words are a burden

And that breaks my heart.

Because what I know now—what I didn’t know then—is this:

Your voice is not a problem.Your words are not an inconvenience.You do not need to sound perfect to be powerful.

Today, I am a speech-language pathologist.And I still stutter.

But I speak. I teach. I lead. I advocate.

That little girl at the deli had no idea where her voice would take her.

And that’s the message I want every child who stutters to hear:

This moment is not your future.This struggle is not your story’s ending.You are allowed to take up space with your words.

Even when they come out differently.

Especially then.